2008-01-10 22:04

Guns don`t kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.

There is no chin under Chuck Norris` Beard. There is only another fist.

Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.

Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.

Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

Chuck Norris` calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris` tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris can speak braille.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris` sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.

On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.

If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn`t say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."

Chuck Norris owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.

Chuck Norris press release...the facts!

2020-11-25 20:54

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Congratulations Leicester City FC

2016-05-13 16:49

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Mart Kapp breaks the 400 goal barrier

2010-02-24 12:03

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Buddha`s Boots

2010-02-03 16:43

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Chuck is seriously tough!

2009-12-24 18:12

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THE TOP TEN CHUCK NORRIS FACTS:

2008-09-12 23:10

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Chuck news flash

2008-06-11 20:54

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Even `Google` know the score!

2008-03-28 17:06

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More facts about the Mighty Chuck

2008-01-10 22:04

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Chuck Norris Facts are hard to swallow

2006-12-21 18:53

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